Slug snail & puppydog tail

Capt. Jack Sparrow FM

I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to write about this, but I suppose this is something we in London stoically accept, it’s a distraction when driving, illegal and costs industry money.

Travelling through a less than salubrious district and listening to LBC James Whale’s radio show recently the signal disintegrated into a jumble of voices. Unlike many of my colleagues I don’t listen to the strong signal provided by Capital Gold (how many times can you listen to the same 20 songs?), preferring rather to listen to talk only stations. With the notable exception of Radio 4, the problem is that these commercial radio stations have a weak signal.

The manufacturers of the “iconic” London taxi, when redesigning the latest vehicle decided to keep the nostalgia of the taxi we remember from our childhood. Unfortunately they were over enthusiastic and kept the poor brakes (without ABS), leaking bodywork and yes, a radio straight out of 1950’s. Some days I turn on the radio expecting to hear Worker’s Playtime amongst the static.

So why should I, just because I haven’t got a digital radio, have to listen to Dizzee Rascal or advertisements from a Caribbean greengrocer?

Pirate interference is a serious problem in London. These stations interfere with licensed broadcasters and make listening to the radio in some areas almost intolerable. The law claims to offer harsh sanctions for those convicted of illegal broadcasting. In 2005 Ofcom seized the transmitter of a West London illegal station as it was causing interference. The station manager was later convicted at Acton Magistrates Court of theft of a transmitter, and of rendering a service to an illegal station. He was fined £250 on each count.

The real world of pirate radio stations nowadays is very different from the romantic and nostalgic picture of the 1960s. The reality is that illegal stations do real harm to the communities they purport to serve. They are operated with wanton disregard for the health and safety of others and, in many cases, are highly profitable operations that feed other criminal activities.

They cause significant disruption and damage to legitimate businesses that have paid significant sums to the Government in licence fees for radio frequencies that are in large part unusable. Many illegal stations are tied to the drugs trade and are used to promote events where drugs can be bought or sold.

A report in the The Times last year summarised the position well when it said:

There are more than 150 illegal stations across the country, a third of which are said to be run by criminal gangs who use them as a front to sell drugs. Previous raids have found drugs, guns and ammunition among the piles of CDs. Drug dealers within earshot of some stations keep tuned to wait for a particular song to be played or a phrase to be uttered, knowing that it is the signal that their next shipment is ready for collection.

There you have it from The Thunder no less, and all I want to do is listen to some London news . . . and drive a cab that been designed for the 21st century without listening to Marconi’s original radio.

CabbieBlog is published regularly under a Creative Commons License by a London Black Cab Driver. Powered by WordPress.com.
Take a look round, you might like what you find. Proudly supporting the National Trust protecting England’s heritage.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Pirate Radio Worker’s Playtime The Times Black Cabs

Lest We Forget

11 November, 2009 at 11:00 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 1 Comment
Tags: in rememberance

This Remembrance Day go along to the corner of Clerkenwell Road and Hatton Garden. There you will find a blue plaque to Sir Hiram Stevens Maxim (5 February, 1840 – 24 November, 1916) an American born inventor who emigrated to England and adopted British citizenship. He was the inventor of the Maxim gun, the first portable, fully automatic machine gun.

Maxim was reported to have said: “In 1882 I was in Vienna, where I met an American whom I had known in the States. He said: ‘Hang your chemistry and electricity! If you want to make a pile of money, invent something that will enable these Europeans to cut each others’ throats with greater facility”.

As a child, Maxim had been knocked over by a rifle’s recoil, and this inspired him to use that recoil force to automatically operate a gun. Between 1883 and 1885 Maxim patented gas, recoil and blow-back methods of operation. After moving to England, he settled in West Norwood where he developed his design for an automatic weapon. He thoughtfully ran announcements in the local press warning that he would be experimenting with the gun in his garden and that neighbours should keep their windows open to avoid the danger of broken glass.

Maxim founded an armaments company to produce his machine gun which later merged with Nordenfeldt and the Vickers Corporation in 1896, becoming ‘Vickers, Son & Maxim’. Their updated design was the standard British machine gun for many years. Sales of the Maxim gun were bought and used extensively by both sides during World War I.

The Battle of the Somme fought from July to November 1916, was among the largest battles of the First World War. With more than 1.5 million casualties, it is also one of the bloodiest military operations recorded. The Allied forces attempted to break through the German lines along a 12-mile front north and south of the River Somme in northern France. The battle is best remembered for its first day, 1 July 1916, on which the British suffered 57,470 casualties, including 19,240 dead – the bloodiest day in the history of the British Army.

Maxim died four months after the start of the Battle of the Somme, profoundly deaf as his hearing had been damaged by years of exposure to the noise of experimenting with his gun.

If only he had stopped with his other weapon of mass destruction, history might have been different . . . the ubiquitous mouse trap.

As a curious footnote the building opposite the blue plaque was the Old Holborn tobacco factory, another purveyor of death.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Blue Plaque Rememberance Day Poppies

Blue Sky Thinking

27 October, 2009 at 1:40 pm | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 3 Comments
Tags: Tourism

Driving past The London Dungeon recently I noticed that they charge £68 for a family ticket to have that gruesome experience, but with queues around the block willing to pay there must an insatiable appetite for death.

So for you, dear reader, who like that sort of thing, I have done some research about Tyburn Gallows.

Erected in 1571 condemned prisoners were driven there in a cart, via St. Giles in the Fields where they received a mug of ale, they dressed either in mourning or in the dress of a bridegroom if they could. Unfortunately the clothes, post-mortem, were the property of the hangman. Well cabbies still expect a tip! In 1447 five men had already been hanged, cut down while still alive, stripped, and marked out of quartering when their pardon arrived, but the hangman declined to give them back their clothes and they were obliged to walk home naked. It really must have been one of those days.

Hanging days were public holidays, as it was considered that the sight of an execution would prove a deterrent. Twenty-one prisoners could be hanged at once (time and motion consultants were even around in the 16th century), and convention dictated the order of precedence so that highwaymen as “the aristocrats of crime”, and the most popular were despatched first, then common thieves, with traitors being left to bring up the rear. With over 300 offences carrying the death penalty, there was never a shortage of participants.

The site of the gallows is marked by a stone in the traffic island at Marble Arch. But some historians suggest that the original site is on a spot near the south-west corner of Connaught Square.

Now recently Connaught Square, which was once known as Tyburnia, has gained another form of notoriety in the shape of one of its residents. Number 29 only five doors from the gallows site is now the London residence of ex-Prime Minister Tony Blair.

Now if only some of the old traditions were revived that would really pull in the punters.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Connaught Square Tyburn Gallows Tony Blair

Memory Men

20 October, 2009 at 1:17 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | Leave a Comment
Tags: the knowledge

You have to feel sorry for high achievers like Lord Winston.

They work hard all their lives and reach the top of their respective professions. Then they find themselves sitting down to dinner with a London Cabbie, possibly sharing a table on a cruise or at a hotel.

The conversation around the table goes something as follows:

Table Chatterbox: turning to Lord Winston “and what do you do Bob”?

Lord Winston: “Well I am a Fellow of the Academy of Medical Sciences, an Honorary Fellow of the Royal Academy of Engineering and Fellow of the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists, I am also a Fellow of the Royal College of Physicians of London, and an Honorary Fellow of the Royal College of Surgeons, Royal College of Physicians and Surgeons, and the Institute of Biology. I also hold honorary doctorates from fourteen universities. In addition to being British medical doctor and scientist, I’m a television presenter, and sit on the Labour Party benches in the House of Lords.”

Table Chatterbox: stifling a yawn, “Oh, really”. With that he turns to me. “Do you have an interesting career David?”

David D’Arcy: “Well actually I’m only a London Cabbie.”

Table Chatterbox: “Well how very interesting, I’ve always wanted to know, just how is it you manage to remember all those roads?”

Just what is the fascination with the Knowledge? I notice you are among the
who have chosen to read this blog on all things cabbie.

We are not as well educated as many graduates, and contrary to popular opinion we’re not as erudite as we would like to think ourselves. We are reputed, incorrectly, to have narrow Right Wing views, with a propensity to favour the British National Party.

Yet I have shared a table with a nuclear physicist, a director of Unilever and a National Health Service consultant, but all the other diners want to know is, just how it is that I could have done the Knowledge.

If I were clever enough to remember 11,500 roads in central London plus all the theatres, hospitals, clubs, public buildings and all manner of miscellanea and could then take the shortest route between any two of them, I would have the brains to be a barrister and wouldn’t be pushing a cab around London.

If you are reading this Lord Winston, and you find yourself in CabbieBlog’s vehicle, just to help your self esteem I’ll donate the fare (with a generous tip) to the charity of your choice.

Got to go now, I’m halfway through reading Blackstone’s Criminal Practice 2010, it’s a riveting read.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Lord Winston The Knowledge London BNP

Backward Cabbie

25 September, 2009 at 10:21 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 4 Comments
Tags: taxis

As it’s still the silly season in the media I though you might like some more nonsense.

A London taxi converted to look like a bumble bee taking part in an insect-inspired festival on London’s South Bank.

Raising awareness of the collapse of bee colonies around the world, one of London’s iconic black cabs has been transformed into a bumblebee in full flight, complete with a working beehive in the front seat. Keep a look out for this spectacular sight, which will be traveling around London.

Backward Cabbie
Harpreet Devi, 30, a cab driver in Punjab, India, was forced to drive his car in reverse for months because of a faulty gear box. The cabbie became so skilled at whizzing around in reverse he decided to modify his motor to drive backwards permanently.

Harpreet’s reversing skills have become so famous in his homeland, he has even been issued with a special government licence to drive in reverse anywhere in the state, located in the county’s north.

His Fiat Padmini, has painted “Back Gear Champian” on the side, and the gear box is reconfigured to have four gears in reverse and one forward. Watch the video.

He can now reach speeds of up to 50 mph while driving backwards.

Mr Devi is a regular sight and sound around the area’s dusty streets, as he uses an ambulance siren to warn unsuspecting drivers, and pedestrians, to avoid him.

“After five years of practice I have perfected the art of reverse driving,” he said, adding that he took “all the care I can to protect other drivers on the road”. I always wanted to do something different, something unique. In simpler terms I reversed the complete gear mechanism of the car so that I get maximum speeds while driving backwards.”

But his somewhat bizarre practice has had one side effect – he has now begun suffering severe neck and back problems.

“I do have pains in the neck – frequent pains in the neck – and I have had severe vomiting in past, I have got a severe backbone problem from driving so fast in reverse, because my whole body gets contorted.”

But he insisted it was worthwhile.

“Achieving something special is never easy, it’s not giving that counts,” he added.

He has even tried to break the Guinness Book of Records for driving in reverse, after searching on the internet and finding a UK resident, John Smith, had achieved such a feat.

“Unfortunately I couldn’t break the world record because the Guinness Book authorities demanded non-stop video footage of my whole reverse driving and I was unable to produce that,” he said.

He was also thwarted a few years ago attempting to drive in reverse from Rajasthan, in the country’s north-west, to Lahore in Pakistan in a bid to promote peace.

He failed because he didn’t have permission to cross the border.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Harpreet Devi Guiness Book of Records

Day-Glo Cabbies

4 September, 2009 at 1:45 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | Leave a Comment
Tags: Brussels

A recent piece of legislation from Brussels, and I would ask you at this point to treat the information with all the gravitas it deserves, concerns that ghastly piece of apparel, the Day-Glo Vest.

In France, Spain and Germany it is now mandatory to carry a high visibility vest in your car’s glove compartment.

The French in their customary fashion have roped in style icon Karl Lagerfeld to help promote the new legislation and to ensure its wearers remain sartorially elegant.

It will only be a matter of time before England follows submissibly down the same path with the €135 fine for infringement as an incentive.

So how long will it be before Transport for London (not known these days for joined up thinking) insists that all London cabbies have to wear that ubiquitous fluorescent vest when plying for hire, with “LICENSED LONDON BLACK TAXI PROPRIETOR” emblazoned across the back, and London fashion guru Jeff Banks brought in to ensure its functionally.

Other items demanded by Europe for cabbies to carry could include a little hamper in case we break down, we then can offer our fare a selection of croissants, brie cheese and a half bottle of Bordeaux while they wait. An umbrella would be useful to keep the sun from their fair heads, to reduce the risk of skin cancer while we wait for help to arrive.

Surely it’s only a matter of time until I have to wear a fluorescent vest to take my dog for a walk in the park, while my little dog sports a canine version of the garment.

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Day-Glo Karl Lagerfeld

The Yellow Peril

14 August, 2009 at 1:47 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 1 Comment
Tags: road signs

Call me a naïve cabbie, but I thought that the yellow police appeal signs were a sensible way of helping to solve crime and not merely a vulgar way to decorate London’s streets. But it would appear the bright yellow police signs appealing for witnesses to serious offences will no longer decorate London’s streets.

In an attempt to reduce “fear of crime”, the Metropolitan Police has effectively banned the use of the distinctive signs in all but exceptional circumstances. Presumably rape, murder, serious assault and armed robbery don’t constitute “exceptional circumstances”, because they were the only ones to gaily bring colour to the pavements of Brixton and Peckham.

Now officers can request their use in exceptional circumstances, but any such requests must be authorised by a “specialist crime directorate commander”. So I want you all to go down to your local nick and request to talk to your “specialist crime directorate commander”. He’s not to be confused with the odd job crime directorate commander who’s in charge minor crimes like dropping litter and allowing your dog to foul the pavement.

Someone in the higher echelons of the Met has become aware that in crime hotspots several yellow signs were being put up at once and presumably thought it showed the police in a bad light, as if crime was out of control.

As a London cabbie I know that the Met are doing their best at preventing “specialist crime”, I see dozens of police in yellow high visibility jackets on the streets every night stopping motorists. But doesn’t that make it look that motoring offences are out of control?

CabbieBlog uses Technorati Tags: Metropolitan Police Yellow Signs London Crime

David v Goliath

24 July, 2009 at 2:03 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 2 Comments
Tags: property developers

The English will always cheer an underdog – no matter if they are English, Scottish or even French – in the interests of fair play, another ideal the English hold in equally high esteem. The English have always loved the underdog: “Eddie the Eagle” Britain’s first (and only) Olympic Ski jumper was ranked 55th in the world at Calgary’s winter Olympics in 1988 and Eddie had all of England cheering for him.

We are a small nation who have taken on giants giving us a David versus Goliath mentality. As a fellow “David” let me relate to you a story while trying hard to conceal a smirk.

The old Wickhams department store on Mile End Road, completed 1927, is a masterpiece of thwarted desire. Although called the “Harrods of the East”, its architectural model was Selfridges, its facade; a confident parade of giant iconic columns in imitation of the Oxford Street version. It even goes one better by having a tower in the centre: Gordon Selfridge planned one for his store but never achieved it.

All would have been perfect had it not been for the Spiegelhalters, a family of jewellers who owned a two-storey building near the middle of the site.

They were descendants of the first Mr Spiegelhalter who had set up shop in Whitechapel in 1828 after coming to Britain from Germany.

The business had moved to 81 Mile End Road in 1880. The Spiegelhalters refused every inducement to sell up, causing an exceptional case of colonnadus interruptus, their little structure causing the march of columns to stop and start again. It also meant the tower was built slightly off-centre. The original idea for Selfridges — a completed colonnade plus a tower — was fated to be achieved in neither Oxford Street nor Mile End Road.

What we have instead is more interesting, a graphic demonstration how competing ambitions and sheer obstinacy shape a city. As it turned out the Spiegelhalters lasted longer. Wickhams closed in the Sixties.
Is there a lesson to be learnt here?

CabbieBlog is published under a Creative Commons License by a London Black Cab Driver.

Powered by WordPress.com.
Take a look round, you might like what you find. Proudly supporting the National Trust protecting England’s heriitage.

Max Miller says goodbye

21 July, 2009 at 1:30 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 3 Comments
Tags: max miller

It’s hard to believe now but once, and I’m afraid you will have to take my word for this, once Leicester Square was a rather splendid public space. But in 1936 town planners decided to steal a march on Hitler and start destroying London first.

The old Alhambra Theatre in Leicester Square was a prime site for “redevelopment”. Max Miller who at the time was probably the most famous entertainer in England, heard it was being demolished and went along for a last look at the theatre he’d performed at on many occasions.

When he arrived at lunchtime on hearing that the famous stage was about to be taken down he climbed on the boards and gave the workmen a hilarious one hour performance. Ten minutes after he’d finished, the stage was gone for ever.

Near the end of his life he confessed that his proudest professional moment was; as he put it “closing the old Alhambra”.

With the prospect of strikes by public service workers imminent I will leave you with a picture of Leicester Square the last time there was industrial action by dustmen.

Happy Birthday, Gordon

19 June, 2009 at 1:30 am | In Slug snail & puppydog tail | 2 Comments
Tags: selfridges

On Monday 15 March 1909 Selfridges Department Store at the Marble Arch end of Oxford Street celebrated its centenary. Here is the story of its founder taken from CabbieBlog’s Hidden London.

Gordon Selfridge the American department store magnet was an interesting fellow who provides a salutary moral lesson for us all.

Gordon devoted his productive years to building Selfridges into Europe’s finest shopping emporium. During that time he led a life of stern rectitude, early bedtimes and tireless work. But in 1918 his wife died and the sudden release from marital bounds rather went to his head. He took up with a pair of Hungarian-American cuties known in music-hall circles as the Dolly Sisters, and he fell into rakish ways. With a Dolly on each arm he dined out every night, invested foolish sums on racehorses, cars, the casinos and even bought a castle in Dorset. In ten years he had spent $8 million, lost control of his department store, his racehorses, Rolls Royces and his castle. He ended up living in a small flat in Putney and travelling everywhere by bus. He died penniless and forgotten in 1947, with a smile on his face thinking of the time he had shagged the twin sisters.

Technorati Tags: Gordon’s Dolly Birds